Since I didn't go to bed until 11 last night, I slept in, and didn't go running. And I wish that I did! Because today has been pretty bad.. My mom woke me up with some bad news... you know how all year long I was STRESSED out about my whole school credit and schedule thing? And how I thought it was all taken care of and lovely? Yeah. The counselors found a conflict in my schedule.. again. This happened last year, I couldn't take Anatomy because of my Graphic Design 2 class, I had to take Graphic Design 1 and Human Biology... both not what I wanted... because I hated GD 1 with all my heart. HB wasn't that bad, I loved it actually. So I'm glad that aspect worked out. But this year the problem was my Honors Gov/Econ class. I couldn't take that and Graphic Design 2 at the same time... of course! I was really sad because I thought that all my worries and stress would go away for a while... but they were back. So in the end, I, well mostly my mom, decided that since I hated GD 1 and I don't want a regular's class with less than average people, I should keep my honor's class and find another elective to replace GD 2. It was a bit tough, but why go through another year of that teacher who drives me insane? I'm not super happy like I was when everything would work out... and I don't even know what other electives I have to choose from... I hope they're not super lame! :( Being positive is really hard when it's you who needs to be positive.
Anyways, I was off to a rough start. My room was messy, too which didn't make me feel any better. I got up, slowly got ready for the day. Plus, I needed to rewrite my resume and drop it off and then go grocery shopping and go through the rest of my day.. :P I got into an argument with my mom... and I cried because sometimes you just have to! Especially when emotions get bottled up and ignored for too long. I feel bad because my mom is always in the wrong place at the wrong time.. :( I was just not feeling good about myself, and my day started off terribly, plus my downfall last night... ahh I don't know why I can't have it together all the time! It's so frustrating... people keep on changing and there is nothing solid in my life right now. Everything I hold dear to my heart eventually leaves one day, and that really got to me today. All I need to feel better is a hug, someone to play with my hair and to tell me everything is gonna be okay.. really, that's IT. Even after bottling stuff up for months. I'm not high maintenance whatsoever, ask anybody, but sometimes those three things can change the world for me! And my mom can never remember to do those three little things. :P So I have to tell her to. Typical. ;P
This would happen. The day after I decide to change, something bad happens! Haha something bad always happens to me. I'm not negative about it! It's just one of those things like, "of course that would happen to Bentley, it's BENTLEY." type of thing.. haha it's quite amusing actually, that nothing goes my way. But I just have to deal with it. And put a smile on my face... maybe this is why I have days like these ones... haha!
After the internet running super slow while trying to download fonts to put on my resume... because fonts can either make or break a job deal, it's proven, I wanted to pick the right ones, especially if it's a Design position I'm looking for! Duh! ;) I finally got it all perfect, and ran it over there, kinda hesitating... anyways, I walk in, hand the guy my resume, and he asked if I do any side projects, I said yes, he said he's give me a call about their next side project!! Ahhh!! Trying not to get my hopes up TOO much, but if this works then I'll be sooo excited! It's JUST what I've been looking for for months! Meanwhile, I'll be babysitting a ton and possibly working at the Pecans planting flowers and such.. who knows? I need to learn how to work harder, anyways. Bring it on!! :)
Mutual tonight, Girls Camp stuff... I'm kinda excited.. I guess. I can't go to Lauren, Lindsay, Max and Jordan's Girls Camp however... :( I'm really bummed about that!! It's because I am already going to my GC and because I have the opportunity, I should let someone else go to their's... which I understand, but considering that I don't have that many friends in the ward, who are girls, I think I should be able to go! :P I guess this is one of those things I'll just have to deal with and make the most of. I know we're doing fun stuff and all... but some girls in my ward......... let's see if I make it out alive. ;)
No comments:
Post a Comment